Home' The Murray Pioneer : August 14th 2019 Contents 2 NEWS www.murraypioneer.com.au Wednesday, August 14, 2019
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Life lessons to look at ploise!
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GET the Barbecue Shapes,
pour the Baileys and get
ready to reminisce – I’ve finally
joined the Kath and Kim fan
Almost 20 years since
Australia’s favourite mother/
daughter duo hit TV screens,
I came across the series on
Netflix, and now have enough
one-liners to last a lifetime.
The comedy gold the pair cre-
ated also serves as valuable edu-
cation in all areas of life.
So, let’s raise a glass of ‘car-
donnay’ and explore the life
lessons these two foxy ladies
from Fountain Lakes – otherwise
known as Jane Turner and Gina
Riley – have shared with viewers
over the years.
Lesson number 1: the impor-
tance of listening. When Kath
asks Kim to find a statue of
“baby Jesus” for her wedding to
“hunk of spunk” Kel, Kim con-
structs a most impressive sculp-
ture of baby cheeses.
Lesson number 2: No one
serves better fitspo than Kath
Day-Knight. Turning Kim’s
bedroom into a home gym, Kath
defends herself. “Does it make
me a crim to keep myself trim?”
she asks. No Kath, and I have
been to the gym every morning
this week, thank you (minus the
fluro, G-string jumpsuits).
This lesson follows on to
number 3: Couples who exer-
cise together, stay together.
Kel and Kath’s synchronised
power walks with dumbbells
and matching tracksuits provide
a strong foundation for their
relationship. And let’s not forget
their Irish, tap and disco danc-
Kim is behind lesson number
4: Love yourself. The “horn-
bag housewife” certainly oozes
self-confidence and good on her.
Even though her marriage to
husband Brett is often over (spelt
O-V-A-H) she never loses sight
of her self-worth.
This behaviour supports les-
son number 5: There’s only one
date that matters. A sticky date.
And don’t forget a Cherry Ripe
is also considered a fruit.
Both Kath and Kim have
taught us lesson number 6:
There’s only one way to get
someone’s attention. “Look at
moiye, look at moiye ploise”,
works every time. Even with
Lesson number 7: Imitation
is the sincerest form of flattery.
When Kim takes Kath and her
“second best friend” Sharon
shopping, she finds the perfect
Jessica Simpson-inspired outfit,
but it looks “more like Homer
Simpson,” according to Kath.
Other than fashion tips, Kim
loves to dish out love advice,
which brings us to lesson
number 8: “Treat ’em mean
and keep ’em keen”. While this
approach may work for some
women, given Brett’s frequent
infidelity I might not take that
Lesson number 9: The perfect
way to describe anything does
exist. Oh yes “it’s nice, it’s
different, it’s unusual” – need I
This brings us to what I con-
sider to be the most important
life lesson at number 10: be able
to laugh at yourself. Life’s too
short to always be serious and
look at the joy it can bring.
I loik what I soi!
The Berri Club will hold a
special general meeting
this Sunday to discuss the
MEMBERS of Berri Club are
encouraged to attend a special
general meeting this Sunday to
discuss the facility’s future.
The Berri Club commit-
tee called the special general
meeting recently, following a
request from members.
The position and future of
the club will be discussed at
In a notice to members last
month club president Steven
Verrall said the board resolved
at its regular meeting in June
to call a special general meet-
ing in response to a request
from a number of members.
It is understood all members
will receive an agenda for the
meeting in advance.
The special general meeting
is scheduled for this Sunday,
12 noon, at the Berri Club.
www.murraypioneer.com.au Wednesday, July 10, 2019 NEWS 3
Functions | Events | Entertainment
Local melon ditcher targeting heavy vehicles
Chuck a fruity
HEAVY vehicle drivers travelling through
Barmera are currently being targeted –
and having their lives endange red – by a
suspected local throwing ‘fruit missiles’ at
Adelaide freight driver Michael Dinnage
was recently heading home through his regu-
lar Riverland route when a flying rockmelon
splattered against his grill and “scared the
life” out of him.
Mr Dinnage said other truck drivers had
reported similar attacks when travelling
through the Barmera area.
“I put up a warning on Facebook and other
truckies said they had been targeted in the
same area, by the same driver, and hit by the
same fruit,” he said.
“People have also reported broken head-
“I’m so shocked someone would even
think to do this.”
The Craig Arthur Transport driver said he
was targeted by the mystery fruit thrower on
Wednesday, June 26, just after 9pm.
“I had just turned off the Monash bypass
and reached the 80km/h zone before the
local BP when I heard a loud bang,” he said.
“I’m pretty sure it was a rockmelon, and it
had that much force.
“When I did the pre-check next trip I lifted
the bonnet and found fruit stuck on the fire-
wall under the bonnet that had come through
to the fuel tank and under the motor.
“If it was a foot higher – I don’t want to
think the worst – but I might not be here.”
An SA Police spokesperson told the
Murray Pioneer the incident was being
investigated and appealed to the Riverland
community for information.
“Dashcam footage shows the fruit was
thrown from a white two-door 4WD travel-
ling east,” the spokesperson said.
“Anyone with information about this inci-
dent or who has experienced any similar
incidents is asked to contact Crime Stoppers
on 1800 333 000 or report it to police on
Murray Mallee Super-intendent James
Blandford said throwing an object at a moving
vehicle was “extremely dangerous”.
“This sort of behaviour puts all road users
at risk,” he said.
“Anyone caught could face offences rang-
ing from ‘throw missile’ to ‘acts to endanger
life’ which can carry a term of imprisonment
up to 18 years.”
Mr Dinnage said truck drivers are often
the targets of pranks on the road.
“We have had kids all over Australia throw
rocks at our trucks,” he said.
“However, this is a fully grown adult
ditching a heavy object who has no care for
other people’s lives.
“Yes we are slow, heavy, big and get in the
way of vehicles. Everyone is in a rush to get
somewhere, so we are a target.
“It seems people treat others on the road
like they are not human.
“Someone will get killed if this keeps
Adelaide truck driver Michael Dinnage had a
rockmelon launched at his heavy vehicle in
Barmera last month, endangering his life on
the road. PHOTOS: supplied
A truck driver’s headlight was smashed after
his vehicle was hit by fruit in Barmera last
month – the second recent case at the spot.
THE future of the Berri Club
is likely to be discussed at a
special general meeting next
The club is currently
closed and the board called
the special meeting, follow-
ing a request from members.
The Murray Pioneer
understands a members’
gathering was held at the
ven ue on Sunday, how ever
the meeting was unauthorised
and failed to comply with the
requirements of the club’s
In a notice to members
on Saturday, club president
Steven Verrall said at its
regular meeting in June,
the board resolved to call a
special general meeting in
response to a request by a
number of members.
The special general meet-
ing is scheduled for Sunday,
August 18, at 12 noon.
A notice on the venue’s
door states the board will
advertise the special meeting
and agenda items across local
media platforms seven to 14
days prior to the meeting.
Meanwhile, a vacant block
of land adjacent the Berri
Club is currently for sale.
at Berri Club
Berri Club will host a special general meeting for members next
month. INSET: A vacant block of land adjacent the Berri Club is for
sale. PHOTOS: Morgan Burley
Special general meeting called
l Murray Pioneer 10/7/19
Club’s future on the agenda
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